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African American women are almost 3x more likely to die from a maternal (pregnancy) causes than white women. No one knows your body like you do, please speak up for yourself! If you feel as though you aren't being heard, please go find someone else! The medical curriculum in America is based on symptoms and statistics that were not created to treat you. Please do not allow anyone to downplay your needs because of stereotypes that African Americans pain tolerances are higher than other races. Research and reach out to your local doulas, they are here to help save the mommies. Your baby needs you. F

Mommies have you felt moody, loss your ambition, can't concentrate, can't sleep even though you are beyond tired, anxious, overwhelmed/overstimulated? You may be experiencing postpartum depression, and it's completely okay. Please know that it doesn't go away overnight and can last years, but with a little effort it will go a long way. Take some time for self-care. Get your nails/toes done. Exfoliate your skin. Take an uninterrupted bath. Go to the spa. Do whatever you need to feel like your beautiful self again. Please utilize your village and take a break! Going to the grocery store IS NOT A BREAK! It's a chore, and doesn't give your mind the necessary down time it needs if you are overstimulated or overwhelmed. Find your triggers! Many emotions that you are experiencing can come from hormones, but sometimes it's little triggers. One of mine was the rain. Talk to someone, counseling helps tremendously. Do your research and find a counselor that fits your style. They are not one size fits all. They are here for you! No one is judging you for asking for help. The best moms do! Even if you don't do it for you, do it for the babies, they feel your energy.

Talk to your partner about your feelings and try to explain them the best way you can. Partners, please understand that most women can't tell you why or even how you can help, because they may not know themselves. It takes some time to work through the emotions and figure out triggers. It took me 2 years to start figuring out how to help myself. Just support her and help. She may not say it or says she has it, but the little things like getting the kids ready for bed or cooking once a week helps more than you'll ever know.

There is beauty at the end of the tunnel!

Having children is a journey! It's beautiful, fearful, You are a QUEEN who is beautiful, loved, and worthy!